3 Important Truths About Trying to Change Other People

“Anytime we argue with reality, we lose. But only 100% of the time.” This quote from Byron Katie speaks a lot of truth, especially when it comes to our interactions with the people we love. The truth is, we cannot change others. As much as we think that it’s right or we think we know what’s best for them, the only person who can decide to change and take steps in a new direction is that individual. 

In today’s Big Idea Tuesday episode, I walk us through a fundamental question we’ve all likely been guilty of: Why do we try to change other people? According to me, there are three main reasons why: 

  1. Because we think we know what’s best for them.
  2. We want to manipulate them into doing what we want them to do.
  3. Because we’re afraid of the unknown—we don’t want other people to make a decision that might leave us behind.

However, it’s not up to us to change others. 

In this episode, I take us through three important truths and one bonus point about trying to change other people:

1) People rarely change, and when they do it’s on their timeline, not yours.

2) The truth is that you can’t possibly know what’s 100% right for someone else’s life.

3) This doesn’t mean you can’t support someone to, or through, change. But first and foremost, you must drop any judgement of them.

Bonus) Set Boundaries: When you 100% accept someone for where they are right now, you can be 1,000% clear with them with what works and doesn’t work for you!

Do you have someone in your life that you wish would change? Take 20 minutes out of your day today to listen.


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Today’s topic was inspired by this post.

I hope you enjoyed this conversation as much as I did.
Wishing you health and happiness.
Dhru Purohit

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